When I say the word problems, what flashes in your mind? Take a pause. Let the thoughts tumble in. Problems carry a weight, don’t they? They stir restlessness in the chest, tighten the jaw, make us feel cornered and powerless. But here is the thing – before we run away from them, let’s see them. Face them. Because without acknowledgement, there is no doorway to anything else. And just so you know, this isn’t another “5 steps to empowerment” pep talk. Nope. Today, we are not sugar-coating it with words like “challenges” or “opportunities in disguise.” We are going to talk about problems – raw, gritty, everyday problems.
Last weekend, I was leading a training workshop. In the middle of our group, one participant suddenly brought up another Zumba instructor. He leaned closer and asked, “Do you know her?” I smiled and said, “Of course. She has been a licensed Zumba instructor for over five years, doing some great work.” He shook his head and added, “Well, she has problems with everyone. She fights with gym owners, sometimes even with clients. Very rude type.” I didn’t go digging into her story. For one, I don’t know her that well. And second, it wasn’t my business. If she’s struggling, it’s up to her to address it or seek help. But you know what? As I listened, I realized this wasn’t really about her at all. This was his problem, not hers. A reflection of how he was perceiving her, carrying that friction inside himself and this has a deeper meaning. We will dive into this later.
And while writing this it got me thinking about my own problems. A few months ago, I was leading a team of leaders – yes, leaders leading leaders. And you know what that means? A mixed bag of personalities. Some supportive, some openly critical, and then…the trickiest kind – those who smile in your face but quietly undercut you behind the scenes. Now, I don’t mind the first two. If you support me, wonderful. If you don’t, that’s okay – I respect honesty. But the double-faced ones? The ones who say yes in the room and no outside of it? That’s where my problem lies. And it gnawed at me. Because the truth is, until we really understand the nature of problems – where they come from, why they exist – we will always be chasing shadows, blowing them up, making them bigger than they actually might be.
Curious about how others see problems, I decided to ask the person closest available to me – my husband. I threw the question at him casually; “What’s a problem for you right now?” Now the first thought in his mind might be, what did I do, lol! But jokes apart, he didn’t blink. “Hundred leads, zero conversions,” he said, talking about a business he is working for right now. Then he quickly added, “Also I don’t like talking about problems.” He also admitted that he struggles when he is not fully in control of his work. Depending on others frustrates him, especially when their delays hold him back from completing his own responsibilities. Interesting, right? Also there are times when I often hear him saying, “I don’t have a problem with this.” So I asked him why he says that. We dug deeper and discovered something revealing – when he says he has no problem, it’s usually about areas where he simply is not very much interested. Take this classic example; choosing food at a restaurant. Now, for me and our daughter, this is an adventure – our eyes dart across the menu, debating, savoring possibilities, like two explorers on a treasure hunt. Food is joy, excitement, play. But for him? He’s indifferent. “I don’t have a problem with whatever you order,” he shrugs. Because it’s not his interest. He participates only because we are interested.
Do you notice now where the roots of our problems truly lie? They don’t exist out there in some random vacuum – they sprout from within us, from the values and principles we hold dear. Problems only become problems when they touch the areas of life we deeply care about. Isn’t that fascinating? Think about it – if something doesn’t matter to you, it rarely disturbs your peace. But the moment it clashes with your beliefs, or interrupts the spaces you treasure, it suddenly grows into a problem. Pay close attention to this realization – it reveals far more about us than about the problem itself.
Let’s revisit the examples, that new instructor said the other Zumba trainer was “rude” because his value is building good relationships with clients and gym owners. For me, I struggle most with people who are double-faced, because honesty and open communication are non-negotiable values in my life. My husband? His frustration comes when leads don’t convert into clients – because he has a winner’s mindset, committed to achieving results. He also bristles when work goes out of his control, because he values speed, accountability, and giving 100%. So, when others delay, it grates against what he stands for.
Do you see the pattern now? Problems are never random – they are mirrors, quietly reflecting our values, priorities, and deepest commitments. What disturbs us most reveals exactly what matters to us. That’s why it’s so important to truly pay attention to the problems we face. Awareness is the first step. We must understand not just the surface of a problem, but its nature, its roots, and its structure. And then we must meet it as it arises. Because the longer we ignore it, the more it lodges itself in our minds, quietly growing, until it piles up into something far heavier than it needed to be. Problems, when faced early, lose their power. They stop being obstacles and instead guide us toward the next necessary step to be taken to resolve them with clarity and purpose. Whether it’s losing a job unexpectedly, a relationship coming to an end, being diagnosed with a chronic condition, facing physical limitations, a parent struggling when their child chooses a non-traditional career path, or simply being stuck in traffic while running late for a meeting – the key is to face them, acknowledge them, and let go of resistance instead of denying them as problems.
Did I just make your problems feel heavier by asking you to prioritize them? That was never the intention. What I wanted was to put some light on the importance of paying attention to the issues we face every single day. In fact, this can be a powerful exercise in self-understanding. Many of my coaching clients often admit that they don’t even realize what they are feeling most of the time – how can they possibly recognize that a problem exists? This is where a mindful lifestyle becomes invaluable. Believe me, awareness shows up more strongly in our difficult moments than in our joyful ones. When we are sad, hurt, or asking “Why me?”, our attention naturally turns inward. That’s the perfect moment to pause, breathe, and gently ask ourselves – What’s really going on here? You can begin with something as simple as a daily practice of reflection, or even commit to a 21-day challenge where you note down the problems you encounter. Over time, this simple habit can help you see patterns, understand yourself more deeply, and grow a little wiser each day.
I think we have dug deep enough into the roots of our problems, and I hope by now one truth is crystal clear; we must face them, not run from them. So, let’s shift gears and talk about resolution. Tell me this – do you believe there’s a single, one-stop solution for every problem? The truth is, even when two people face the exact same challenge, the way they resolve it will differ, shaped by their unique values, beliefs, and life experiences. But here’s what I know for certain – the ultimate solution to every problem is not out there in some formula or fixed method. The real solution lies within you. Only you can uncover the resolve that fits your life, your truth, your journey. So, what can we all do when a problem shows up? The very first step is simple yet powerful – acknowledge it. Accept it, and have the courage to face it instead of pushing it away. If you feel safe enough, share it with someone close. Sometimes all we need is a listening ear, not advice or solutions. The second step is to release the resistance wrapped around the problem. Stop wrestling with the “why me” and instead respond with flexibility with an agile mindset that looks for possibilities rather than dead ends. And finally, the third step – the most important one – is to remind yourself that this problem, like everything else in life, is temporary. Nothing stays the same forever. To make this more real, let me share a few examples that might give you some relief and perspective in these unpleasant times.
1. Problem – If someone loses their job unexpectedly. Agile Response – Instead of panicking, explore why this happened, if reasons are in your control you can work towards the same, otherwise upskill and most importantly plan your finances for next 6 months at least. If freelancing could be your temporary resolve or if you can think of secondary income to earn from. This energy shift can make you feel worthy again. If the situation and decision were not in your control just let it go, move forward. Acceptance Response – Accept that this has happened to you and do not connect this to your social image and thus stop resisting the situation (“Why me?”) and channel energy into what’s next as change is the only constant of life. Only you truly know what’s best for you – so explore it, trust yourself, and walk the path that leads to your own fulfillment.
2. Problem – A close friendship or relationship ends. Agile Response – Most breakups happen for a few common reasons sometimes one person outgrows the other, sometimes values shift, and other times someone new enters the picture and feels more appealing. Whatever the reason may be in your case, remember this – you are still worthy of love, you are still important. The heaviness you feel right now isn’t because you are broken, but because you still care for this person, and especially, in love change is never easy to embrace. One gentle way to support yourself through this transition is by bringing small shifts into your daily routine. For instance, if you usually work out in the mornings, try an evening Zumba, Yoga, or Spinning class instead. Movement-based practices are deeply healing – they don’t just move your body, they move your emotions too, improving circulation and creating space for new energy to flow. Acceptance Response – Accept that this has happened, and try not to tie it to your self-worth or your social image – remind yourself that it doesn’t mean you are unloved or lacking. People grow apart, and that’s a natural part of life. Instead of holding onto resentment, give yourself permission to take a break. Spend time with yourself and connect with friends who truly understand you. Most importantly, resist the urge to rush into another relationship. A rebound rarely brings healing – it can end up harming both hearts involved. Heal first. Trust the process, for your own well-being. If you feel the need to be truly heard, consider coaching sessions or join a support network. This way, you will discover something powerful – you are not alone in this journey.
3. Problem – Being diagnosed with a chronic condition or facing physical limitations. Agile Response – Adjusting lifestyle habits can help. Exploring new hobbies or forms of exercise for more self love and a gentle reminder to self – this is only temporary. Acceptance Response – Embracing the body’s new reality instead of fighting it daily. Let go of resistance to accept and adapt.
4. Problem – A parent may struggle when their child chooses a path that differs from tradition – whether it’s pursuing a non‑conventional career or embracing an LGBTQ identity. Agile Response – Reframing your own beliefs within yourself and supporting the child’s choices. Take help if needed – a counselling or coaching session for yourself might help. Acceptance Response – Letting go of the need to control outcomes means embracing each person’s individuality. Remember – you cannot decide everything for your child. Allow them the space to discover their own path to fulfillment. Accept and adapt to the understanding that you don’t have to know what’s best for them. We all are resourceful.
5. Problem – A manager faces constant team resistance. Agile Response – Experiment with new ways of communicating and actively seek feedback. Your role is to mentor and support your team members whenever they need it – that’s where your control ends. Remember this – when someone behaves maliciously toward you, it’s rarely about you – it’s about the struggles they are carrying. Only they can choose to step out of that low‑vibe energy, if they truly want to. Acceptance Response –Understand that not everyone will adapt to you and that’s perfectly okay. You are not defined by how others behave toward you; you are defined by your attitude toward everyone around you.
6. Daily Life Micro-Problems Traffic jam → Instead of road rage, use the time for a podcast or mindful breathing or listening to your favorite music. Tech failure → Accepting delays and using it as an opportunity to rest or plan. No inquiries for your business→ This is your time to find more avenues to attract new leads and use this time for content creation – educate masses about your business. Plans canceled → Agility to create new experiences, acceptance of what is.
Problems are not roadblocks; they are invitations. Each challenge, each discomfort, is an opportunity to understand yourself better, strengthen your mindset, and practice the art of agility and acceptance. When we stop resisting and start observing, when we respond instead of reacting, we discover that freedom is not the absence of problems, but the mastery of how we face and handle them. Perhaps the most valuable life skill you can master is the art of improvisation. So, as you step forward, carry this mantra with you: “I choose acceptance, release resistance, and live with freedom in every moment that unfolds.” Repeat it daily. Let it remind you that no matter what life throws your way, you have the power to meet it, learn from it, and move forward with clarity, courage, and calm. You are resourceful and you got this!
