My heart ached… When was the last time you were deeply upset, not because something happened to you, but because it went against your principles and ethics?
Last weekend felt like a page torn straight out of a dream. My husband and I have always shared this love for exploring new cities – the scent of unknown streets, the silent hum of airport chatter, that delicious thrill of discovering something new. But this time, it wasn’t just about travel. It was about growth. I had dragged him lovingly, of course into my world of learning from the best of the best. “Four days,” I told him, my eyes gleaming. “Just be open. That’s all I ask.” He raised an eyebrow, half-smiling. “Four full days of motivational talk? You are lucky I love you.” I laughed, clapping my hands. “Couple goals, yayyyy!” He rolled his eyes, and I thought to myself – “Let’s not push it, lol.” And just like that, we were off – two people on a journey that was more inward than outward. When Tony Robbins finally walked onto the stage, the energy in the arena exploded. 17000 voices cheered, the music pulsed through our bones, and goosebumps rippled down my arms. My heart raced – I could feel the power in his words vibrating through the air. At one point, I felt my throat tighten and tears blur my vision. “Oh my God,” I whispered, my voice breaking, “I can’t believe I am actually here.” It wasn’t just listening – it was feeling. Every word sank deep, every story cracked open something inside me. I had heard Tony countless times on podcasts and videos, but this… this was different. This was raw, electric, and alive. We had bought VIP tickets (thinking it would be a smaller group – surprise, it wasn’t, so many VIPs!) and settled in with our journals, ready to soak in every moment.
Next to us sat an Indian couple, originally from Punjab but now living in LA. During Tony’s session – while everyone was deeply engrossed – I noticed the husband glued to his phone. Constantly. At first, I dismissed it. Maybe work? Maybe urgent messages? But soon it became impossible to ignore. During a coffee break, my husband quietly mentioned, “He’s chatting with someone… and it looks more than just friendly.” Out of curiosity and concern, we both easily stole glimpses at his screen, noticing how he constantly angled it away, keeping it hidden from his wife’s view. Affectionate messages – “Love you,” “Miss you,” “Kisses”… all being typed, deleted, and archived – right next to his wife. He even stepped out to “get coffee,” all while secretly coordinating through chat. We guessed the woman he was messaging was somewhere in the same event too. And my heart broke. Not because I knew them. Not because I was personally involved. But because I felt the betrayal that woman didn’t yet know she was living with. My heart ached for her. I could not believe my eyes – a man sitting in a self-growth event, soaking in lessons on transformation, yet quietly practicing deceit right beside him. It hit me like a jolt, cutting straight to the core of my values and ethics. How often do we chase “growth” without integrity, seeking fulfillment in the outside world while leaving the inside hollow? As you read this, perhaps take a moment to pause and reflect on your own boundaries, your principles, and what you truly stand for when it comes to relationships and loyalty. Give yourself the space to let your thoughts flow freely. When the first day ended, I hugged his wife tightly. Maybe she sensed the unspoken words in that embrace. Maybe she didn’t. But my eyes found his, and I let my gaze speak the truth: “You know exactly what you are doing.”
As we walked back to our hotel, I leaned toward my husband saying, “Let’s avoid sitting near this energy tomorrow… and for the rest of the three days.” That night, I couldn’t sleep. I kept asking myself – Why does infidelity disturb me so deeply, even when it’s not my story? The answer was simple – it clashed with everything I personally stand for. Loyalty, honesty, and truth aren’t just ideals; they are non-negotiables in my world. But it was not just that. I also felt a deep helplessness, powerless to help that couple realign their lives or make the choices they needed. My heart ached even more when I thought of their children – the naive faces on that man’s phone wallpaper haunting my mind as a silent reminder of the ripple effects of betrayal. This made me pause and reflect – when was the last time I might have unknowingly or unconsciously betrayed someone? Surely, I must have – after all, I am human, and mistakes are part of our journey. The hope is that we learn from them and make a conscious choice not to repeat the same patterns. We all betray, in one way or another, at some point in life – whatever the reason. And haven’t we all been on the receiving end of betrayal too? By friends, colleagues, or people we trusted deeply? But when that betrayal comes from someone we call a partner, it shakes the very foundation of who we are, challenging not just our trust, but our sense of self and that is crazy deep. So why do so many choose to stay? Why do we continue accepting half-hearted love and unfaithful companionship? At the same time, a deeper question arises – a mirror for self-reflection – why do some betray the very people they call partners, spouses, or closest friends? Is it fear of loneliness? Is it comfort disguised as love? Or is it the quiet, unspoken belief that we don’t deserve anything better than what we have right now? Let’s pause and ask ourselves – is betrayal ever fair? And if so, fair to whom? Is it truly okay to remain in a relationship that’s emotionally dishonest? Are any reasons – whether intentional or unintentional – enough to justify unfaithfulness? And which partner is expected to accept what? It all becomes tangled, because so often we feel pressured to explain or justify our actions, aren’t our hearts pleading for honesty. Your gut always knows. Your body knows. Your intuition screams long before your mind accepts. Don’t silence that voice and have courage to accept what you want. Whether it means trusting more or walking away – let’s face it.
Cheating often happens because we are not truly happy where we exist in that moment of life. That’s it. Perhaps it’s an uncomfortable truth – unspoken, yet blunt. Or maybe I say this because it comes from my own wisdom, shaped by the choices I have made and the values I strive to live by. Take a moment and write down what freedom truly means to you. Reflect on the kind of partner you wish to be with – someone you feel aligned with, someone you can commit to wholeheartedly. And if commitment isn’t a value you prioritize, that’s absolutely valid too – but honesty is key. Communicate your intentions clearly so your partner can make their own choices for their own peace and harmony. You both deserve the best for yourself. Life is far too vast to be confined within betrayal, too precious to be spent proving your worth to someone who has forgotten it. You don’t owe anyone a version of yourself that tolerates dishonesty. What you owe is truth – to yourself and to your heart. Freedom from the unfaithful isn’t just about walking away; it’s about reclaiming your integrity, your self-worth, and your peace. It’s about refusing to accept incompleteness when you were born whole, and living this one life in alignment with your true potential.
Here’s a gentle reminder: You can start again. You can create a life rooted in honesty and wholeness. You can love without fear and live without pretending. Do not rush, take your time.
Because freedom begins the moment you choose yourself and summon the courage to honor your values. In relationships, empathy matters most – even if it’s just a basic understanding that your partner is human, just like you, start here. True love doesn’t need explanations. When love exists, there is no room for dishonesty, no space for betrayal, and no effort required to maintain it artificially. Take a moment to reflect on your own choices – past or recent betrayals – because your actions are the one thing truly within your control. Choose to live free, and create space for your loved ones to live and breathe freely too, especially if you are building a life filled with intimate, meaningful relationships.
